“How can you stay in love if there is never any room for them?
Partners need prayer and talents need practice. People and things both require an investment of effort, but it’s your own adornment that keeps the feeling alive. Without it, your purpose and meaning in life are lost.
Leave enough space in your mind and slack in your days to remember your love for them.”
“The opposite of love isn't hate; it's indifference.” - Steven Pressfield, The War of Art
The ones that are best at what they do LOVE their craft.
What’s less spoken about is how delicate of a balance preserving that love is. It requires mental gymnastics to apply enough pressure to improve but not so much that you begin to drain yourself of enjoyment and sour it into hate. Hate, that if left unchallenged, will spill over into indifference.
To maintain a proper balance, be a fan and a professional.
Love in a relationship is sustained through maintenance.1
In the ritual of everyday life, even relationships become familiar. So familiar that they gradually fade into indifference. Date nights become fewer and phone calls become rare. Each thought of yours that drifts away from them is one less thread you can use to hold on to them.
Avoid indifference through novelty and reminiscing about the past.
Set down your own agenda, if just for a while.
Put down your own agenda to lessen the numbing effect of obsession and to recover from burnout. Use the time for two things; investing your time, attention, and energy into those you love and take stock of what you’ve missed doing.
Maybe even more importantly, notice what you don’t miss doing and stop doing them.
Until next time,
Favorite thing of the week: Read the Best 100 Books Over and Over Again2
I’m on my third read-through of “How to Take Smart Notes”, it’s taken a tremendous amount of energy to understand the practice and philosophy behind the Zettelkasten method. But I know absorbing its knowledge will prove more useful than reading wasted books I won’t implement.